My Birthday: Lady Vengeance

(When I prayed in my forest shrine for guidance
The Spirits gave me a knife…)
My golden hair flows over my red gown
My blue eyes stained with black tears
Who will be the next that I must sacrifice myself to
For Him?
(Blade of silver, into which I can see his face,
Stained with blood and raven feathers…
The heavens wept when He fell-)
His ghost is with me as I dance,
his dark shadow teases in the club lights,
he flickers alive then dead in the eyes of lover-killers watching
(And with enraged eyes, the heavens saw the weapon in my hands
though my gown was White-
Oh my Black Angel
Is seven ages of suffering enough for you?)
But my sorrow, my death
Is to invisible everyone
Save the angel-ghost
(Oh the heavens lament
The death of the Golden Tree-King
A Sacrifice encompassing the world
But what of my silent sacrifice of White?)
Today the Seventh has killed me also
But with this last death I find myself alive
And as I celebrate, with white cake
My Birth
The smoke rises to a crystal chandelier overhead with red candles
And all is quiet
As an Angel passes overhead…
(Oh I am Crimson Lady
Buried in snow light
Who alone suffers the dying
Of a world that is ghost-
 *Of the One who fell*)
The boy appears to me
In my room
And just as I am about to confess the Secret
He covers my mouth with his hands
And gives me a branch of white poplar
 (He whispers in my ear-
‘It is now enough-’)
This Lady Vengeance
Finds herself free now
The blade has penetrated this maternal ghost heart seven times
And now the angel-boy has pulled it out-
*and placed it in my hands*
Oh I can see Him through the mists of Time
With every death He became more alive
And now as my last lover has killed me-
He appears before me, regal, immortal…
(This day the angels are gathering to remember the Death
But now the knife will point to the true murderer-
And all will say
*She has suffered in innocence*)
Oh the lies that fell from the lips of lovers
that have pierced this Virgin heart
And killed the Angel seven times-
Lies are Legion but the Author is One
I can see you face to face now, mine Enemy
Oh there is still a Truth that is still Virgin, unpenetrated
My slicing is deeper than Lies
Oh I am Lady Vengeance
Whose Truth shines silver, eternal blade
Let my athame hiss sweetly tonight
 © Rachael Bulla Feb 26,  2007

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Lucifera

Oh this candle glow of my spirit
Once lit by sunlight
Put out by the deep…
Oh but as the abyss stared into me
I stared back into it
(Murder)
Its gift to me-
A *new flame*
Serpant-fire of darklight
Oh the beautiful horror
Is all
Esctasy of lifedeath
Once only glimmered tauntingly
In the emerald eyes of my love
Is now the only Eye
That meets mine
(Murder)
All leads back to the Eye-
All eventually traces back
To the imagining-castle
Of the One
With his Holy voice
The One whispers
Of a Memory older
And younger
than Time
(Murder)
With his Ghost voice
The One whispers
That even through the suffering
The sorrow and loss
The Treasure will be born
All leads back to the Eye
All leads back to the North
The Sun has a FatherMother
Womb of glitterous frost-fire teeth
Oh this candle glow of my spirit
Once yellow-gold
Now White
And as the Northern Crown
Rains like diamonds
I too, a light-bearer
(Rein…)
© Rachael Bulla June 8 2007

Dance

His regard is steady, dispassionate
Artless
Like his flatly timed step
As he guides their dance
In refined ornateness
To the rhythms and sighs of his audience
This is his world
To which the shrouded in his arms
Turns-
in the gossamer of clouds
Her heels too fragile to touch the dirt-ridden floor
Yet too heavy with bone and sinew
To float to the heavens
Her back arches slightly as though sustaining a weight with grace
Her hand rests on his shoulder like dew
As she follows in perfect simultaneity in the foreknowledge of his lead…
His strong arm and the audience
only half real
Her gaze mute,vague, askew-
Resting on the spaces between swirling air particles…
***
The spaces between air particles
Are like the spaces between worlds
Where she flows in strange elegance
Pregnant and empty as the wind
Shining with the life of ice crystals
Her umbilical chord
Stretching like Jacob’s ladder
From her cold northern axis
To shadow-lands  beneath
Queen of the spaces between worlds
She dangles
white
Like a magnificent spider
***
Enfolded in his lead
Her light spinning
Is a mesmerizing thing
That quietly stays time
And for a moment the audience forgets itself
and gasps–
Feeling its life breath
© Rachael Bulla  12/28/2001